“Congratulations, Doctor. You’re officially a veterinarian.” The words rang in my ear, feeling ridiculous, a joke, even.
If you live with a cat, you know you’ve been there. It’s the middle of the night. You wake up feeling like your bladder may rupture, so you stumble half asleep out of bed, plodding dumbly down the hall to the bathroom. Then suddenly you feel it. At first, it seems like maybe just a little moisture between your toes. But as you step down you feel the goo, the glob of wet furry grossness against your bare foot. And you know. You’ve been hairballed.
People do strange things. That’s a given But what’s up with all these crazy New Year’s resolutions? Smells like dog poo to me. Seriously, people, do you really need to come up with a list of things, year after year, just so you can, yet again, disappoint yourself?
Well, I’m here to tell you that there is a better way, a more effective way, to be your best self. So please put that list of New Year’s resolutions in the litter box where it belongs. This year really can be the year that you change for good.
Dear Santa Paws,
It’s me. You know. Pebbles the blind cat. Pebbles the sweet little angel.
Mom and I just had a very interesting conversation about you. If Mom is accurate in her account of how this all works (and I know she tries), you accept requests for items to be delivered directly to our home the night of Christmas Eve. This is excellent news because I have a wish list for you! Being the giving little tabby that I am, I have also included my family on my wish list as well.
It’s officially the Christmas Season! I am so excited for my first full Christmas as an adult cat. There’s food, family, new outfits. There’s even a tree in the house to climb with boxes underneath wrapped in easily shreddable paper! And, of course, there’s Santa Paws.
What, you’ve never heard of Santa Paws? Well, I hadn’t either until a few days ago. I was helping Mom put up the Christmas decorations when she started telling me all about Santa Paws and his eight tiny rain dogs. I was an infant last Christmas, so this was all new information to me. Well, just in case this is your first Christmas also, why don’t you kick back, curl up on your favorite pillow, and get yourself a nice big bowl of Cat Treats while Mom and I discuss the amazing Legend of Santa Paws.